Acknowledgments | p. ix |
Introduction | p. 1 |
Dumb and Dumber Don't Even Begin to Describe It--My Years with the Philadelphia 76ers (Following a Brief Detour in the Desert) | p. 9 |
The Meanest, Funniest, Smelliest, and Softest Players in the League and How Larry Bird's Better Than Most People Think, Hakeem Is Nastier, and Michael Jordan Is Much, Much, Much Meaner | p. 21 |
Pleasures of the Flesh, Temptations of the Spirit, and How Charles Barkley Took Me Under His Wing and Proceeded to Shave Four Years off My Life | p. 45 |
Bathroom Brawls, Cheating and Arguing with Teammates over Stats. Why I Love the College Game | p. 67 |
Poverty, Wealth, My Plan for Making Every NBA Player Take a Nine-to-Five Job Laying Bricks for Two Years Before Entering the League and Why I'll Puke If I Hear Another Kid Say, "I'm Leaving College 'Cause My Mama Needs a New House" | p. 87 |
Race, Racism and the Night Tom Gugliotta Told Keith (the Great White Hope) Van Horn, "There's One Sheriff in Town, and I'm It," Then Proceeded to Light Him Up for 35 Points | p. 103 |
Dirty Tricks, Hidden Fouls, Head Games and Other Tools of an NBA Veteran's Trade | p. 119 |
On the Road, at the Bars and in the Backwoods. L.A. Has the Best Cheerleaders, There Are Some Real Animals in New York City, and Milwaukee Is Strictly Laverne and Shirley. Plus, Why Utah Fans Are Crazy but Nice | p. 137 |
Friends, Hangers-on, Entourages and the Relative You Haven't Heard from in Ten Years Who Wants to Borrow Fifteen Grand--Yesterday | p. 149 |
What's Love Got to Do with It? Or Why Guys Who Really Can't Stand Each Other Can Be Great Teammates, Why Good Friends Occasionally Almost Kill Each Other and Who Hates Who | p. 159 |
Riches, Fame, Celebrity, and the Night George Bush and I Put Our Heads Together to Figure Out What Was Up with UFOs, Aliens and Area 51 | p. 175 |
Liars, Cheats, Tramps and Thieves. All About Coaches (with a Few Words on Refs) | p. 187 |
What's Young and Skinny and Can Do a 580-Degree-Double-Pump-Backward Jam but Doesn't Know How to Shoot a Jump Shot or Set a Back-Side Pick? Meet the Future of the NBA | p. 211 |
Trash-Talking, Violence, Toughness and Why Most Seven-Footers with Big Muscles Wouldn't Know What to Do If They Ever Got in a Fight | p. 219 |
The Swamp Called the Meadowlands--My Up and Down, Loving and Hating, Bench-Riding and All-Star Career with the New Jersey Nets | p. 243 |
What the NBA Has Taught Me About Life | p. 259 |
Index | p. 267 |
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